On time for introspection

It has been a long time since I have felt like writing here.  We are all fine, thankfully.  But for me it has been a season of introspection and pulling back a little.  My own down time or quiet time is nearly non-existent currently; the days start early and end late, and are nearly always full in between. I had some jaw problems flare up after an incident with a filling, and dealing with chronic pain and headaches and eating restrictions has not made me exactly a happy camper some days.  And to a small degree, I lost a little of the joy of what I do day to day.  But there have been some very specific things that have helped me feel more like my normal self.

-- Spring!  Oh spring, even if you are more rainy than usual, we love you.  The freedom to go on a hike or a short run in decent weather feels so good.  Lately my favorite outdoor activity, when I have time, is to hike a short trail near our home.  We are lucky to live close to the mountains and there is nothing like being up in them.

-- Isaiah class.  One of the women in our ward volunteered her time to teach an Isaiah class to anyone who wanted to come, beginning last fall.  I started going a few weeks into the class and it has been the highlight of my week ever since.  It has been very rewarding to spend time digging a little deeper into the scriptures and understanding more of the book of Isaiah -- of its themes and symbols and prophecies.  We all came away with more love and respect for the prophet Isaiah, for his willingness to record the things he did, for his love for the Savior that is apparent in his writings.  We saw continuous threads of gospel principles through all the standard works and through all the dispensations of time.  We came to understand and love each other better as we shared insights and life experiences.  Our testimonies and friendships grew.  It was truly a gift.

-- Practicing gratitude.  When I'm not feeling grateful, I learned, is the time for me to actively practice being grateful!  And it makes a big difference in changing my perspective and my mood.

-- Spending time with my kids.  When I put focused, present time into any of my important relationships, I always feel happier.

-- Taking time when needed for myself, but also being more accepting of the stage of life -- there simply cannot be much time for myself right now.  It is a balancing act between accepting this season and inserting myself as a priority regularly enough, though usually in small increments, that I don't become resentful of the constant demands on my time.

-- Letting my feelings surface.  Kind of a funny one, but we have experienced bigger than usual excitements, joys, scares, sorrows, and disappointments recently.  When I give those emotions time to take hold, and express them, I feel better connected to myself.  I have also learned that the bigger the emotion, the longer it takes to process.  For me this means I sometimes have less energy for extra things for a time.

Catalina Island in the distance

School is winding down and we're gearing up for summer.  It will be a busy one, but fun.  I started teaching a few piano lessons again, trying to improve my skills by learning from a few master teachers.  We had a fun soccer season with Anna and Kate, watched Talmage perform in his last big ballroom concert at Churchill, had a great cello recital with Dallin.  I have been paying Julia occasionally to cook dinner and that has been so great!  She is really a good cook now.  (She doesn't ALWAYS get paid to cook dinner though . . .)  Life really is good, and I want to be better at seeing the little daily joys amidst the tasks and trials.

These pictures are from a business trip I took with Matt in February to California.  Those few days were the most peaceful, quiet, soothing days of my year.  I spent the time reading, relaxing, and walking along the beautiful coastline.  I came home from the trip recharged.  It doesn't happen often, but is so great when it does!